Women are their own worst critics and I am no exception. I know I am.
Over the last year or two I have fallen back into a pattern of seeing myself and not liking what I see and also not being too nice to myself either.
It has been a constant battle between me the mirror and my mind.
I have been very candid about my struggle with self as esteem and body image.
For the past two years maintaining a happy weight has been such a struggle. I have struggle to be consistent in just about everything I have tried.
I even began to take diet pills in the earlier part of the year something I have not done in over 10 years. Just as they always do I lost a few pounds and once I stop, I have gained every pound back.
My partner and I have been doing our best to get in the gym every week but the motivation eves and flow. I stick to it one week and then fall off for a few days and then pick it back up.
I know that where I currently am in my journey is 100% my fault, lack of consistency, choosing the wrong foods and laziness.
If I know that this is the case, why should I be mad about what I see in the mirror or on a picture?
Mentally I have chosen to accept where I currently am in my journey. Embracing my current body type which has changed I am now a size 12 which is considered a mid-size girl and I choose to Own it.
Lately I have been following other mid-sized Instagram influencers to see their style but also find their confidence to be aspiring.
This weekend I went on a little getaway to Las Vegas to celebrate my boyfriend’s birthday. Every day that I got dressed to head out I felt so good. when I saw the pictures, we took I did not tear myself down though I noticed my weight, that I look a bit older and that there was grey hair everywhere? No, I actually felt good about myself, I felt pretty.
I think how I felt showed in every picture.
Will I continue to try and do better for my health absolutely, but I also want to continue to embrace where I am in every stage and know that I am beautiful no matter what size I am.
How have you dealt with weight changes in the past or the present I would love to hear>’
Until next time
xoxo Kieks
Everything Kieks 
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