The Battle is not over!

The following is based on my experience with mental health and is not meant to diagnose or treat any mental disorder. If you or someone you know is struggling with a mental disorder, please contact your Doctor, Therapist or Mental Health Hotline in your area.

I have been very candid over the years about my anxiety and mild depression. I am huge overthinker and when I spiral sometimes it is a battle to get out of it.

Over the last week or so I have been feeling anxious and overwhelmed border lined depressed, stemming from daily stressors, constantly thinking about what’s next, not expressing my feelings over various small things which you know can feel like huge things when we don’t talk about them and lastly taking on other people’s issues. All things I know I should not do but sometimes we fall into old habits un-intentionally.

My High Anxiety Indicators

• Intense feelings of sadness – I had just finished something I felt proud my journal, actually got the most blog view I’ve had to date, but for some reason I couldn’t feel happy I focused on all the things not happening in my life instead of the things currently happening.
• Increased heart rate -My apple watches actually alerted me to this a few days ago. I had been feeling shortness of breath, but I thought it was just my allergies triggering my asthmas usually when that happens, I used my albuterol pump that tends to increase my heart rate and cause gitterz for a while.
• Short temper/easily angered– I was very snappy at home everything irritated my spirit lol and it showed. My daughter sent me a voice message to download me about her job issues and I literally snapped.
• Lost Focus – Missing emails at work forgetting task.
• Feeling alone – Even in a crowded space I felt so alone. or feeling like I can’t talk to anyone they won’t understand.
• Body dysmorphia -Something that I have noticed over the years is how my body dysmorphia is triggered at the same time as anxiety. I find myself attacking myself my looks my body. No one can tell me I look good because I don’t in my head. learn more about my body dysmorphia struggle here!

This weekend I tried to get out the house and shake all the feelings I had been feeling a get out and socialize for a bit. I was triggered by having to rush (a small thing right) but it felt so big. Long story short everything after that became a trigger.

On my drive home from attempting to socialize which went so wrong. I began to feel every emotion rise it became extremely hot and overwhelming and I felt like I could not breath the anxiety started to take over and could not control it I spent my 20 min drive home trying to stop shaking and take deep breaths. Honestly some of it is a blur, thank God, I made it home! I honestly had not had one this bad in over 5 years.

The day after my anxiety attack after praying I opened my daily devotional to this message!

My first time having an anxiety attack I was 18 years old and pregnant we all thought I was having an asthma attack but after the ambulance came and checked my lungs that were clear learned that it wasn’t my asthma, but it was an anxiety attack make sense I was a teenager having a baby soon and the fear of that had bubbled over.

This episode forced me take some control over it.

1. I had a good cry not a few tears but the kind of cries that actually sound like you are in pain.
2. I had to have the conversations about all those little things that had been building up.(had another big cry)
3. Journaled to get everything else out.
4. Talked to a friend
5. Quiet time just me and a cup of tea
6. lighthearted conversation and laughter
7. Intimacy (Yes Sex does relieve stress and anxiety by triggering the release of feel-good hormones including oxytocin.)

If you suffer with anxiety, remember that you’re not alone, and it’s completely okay to feel overwhelmed. Take a deep breath and allow yourself some time to relax and recharge.

Here are some things that might help you feel better during and after an anxiety attack:

1. Take slow, deep breaths: Focus on the sensation of the air moving in and out of your body.
2. Practice self-compassion: Be kind and understanding with yourself, just as you would with a friend.
3. Engage in physical activity: Go for a gentle walk or do some light stretching to help release tension.
4. Connect with someone: Reach out to a trusted friend, family member, or mental health professional for support.
5. Take a break: Allow yourself time to rest and step away from stressful situations or stimuli.
6. Practice mindfulness: Focus on the present moment and let go of worries about the past or future.
7. Try progressive muscle relaxation: Tense and then relax different muscle groups in your body, starting with your toes and moving up to your head.
8. Write down your thoughts: Journaling can help you process and release your emotions.
9. Get enough sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of restful sleep to help regulate your mood.
10. Remember that you’re strong: You’ve overcome challenges before, and you can do it again.

Remember, taking care of your mental health is essential, and it’s okay to ask for help when you need it. Sending you lots of support and positive vibes!

*Looking at the pics a took from that night I looked nothing like how I felt!

If you or someone you know is struggling mentally and have thoughts of harming themselves or others, please contact:

The National Alliance on Mental Health -NAMI HelpLine is available M-F, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m. ET. Call 800-950-6264, text “helpline” to 62640, or chat online. In a crisis, call or text 988 (24/7).